Some really amazing people left me some really amazing feedback about my 4am blogpost the other day. I appreciate it more than you all know.
I was thinking again today (I know, weird, right?) about purpose and glorifying God and knowing He is pleased, etc. In the states, I hope God is happy with what I’m doing/how I’m living. Here, even if I didn’t get to teach at all (but I have) because of political rallies/danger, it would be okay, because he was remarkably clear about the calling he put before me to be in Kenya.
I’d rather have the confidence that he’s happy than anything else—more than a round trip plane ticket to any country yearly for my life, a perfect husband, etc. Sometimes he gives me that gift (of “feeling he is pleased”) and other times, not so much.
Today I taught and class went well. Students are SO happy to be learning, and they are fun to teach—after Jackie took me with lawi to exchange money, eat a “veggie burger” and hit masai market. I had a hard time there. For one, I was followed by a guy who wanted to “help” me find things I wanted…he got really really intense. Lawi helped me to bargain but even though he could get things for 1/10 the cost I could (and buy them after I left), I felt I wanted the people to know I thought things were valuable. Hard to explain, cause I’ve been in markets around the world and in Marrakech and Jerusalem for example, it was like a game of how low can I get the price..i mean, 8 durham’s 1 dollar and sometimes id haggle for 5 durham forever…looking back, its not a game for them and they could use 5 durham more than I can.
Anyways, I just felt semi-convicted about the way I was paying nothing for intricately designed jewelry etc. and especially this one thing I got my family (I almost wrote what it is!). After, Lawi informed me that the men attacking me like barracudas take the money I pay (most of it) and give part to the actual creators, so really the paying more (cause I wanted them to benefit after their “we have to survive and this cost more than that just for materials” trip) didn’t help them anyways. I told lawi he shouldve told me before (the guy following me said I could only shop with him because it’s a family business and I have to pay him for their stuff..) Anyway, no real harm done and a lesson learned.
I mentioned it cause I realized that even though I have moments where I’m not sure who to give to or what to do, I still know tonight that God is protecting/loving/maybe even happy with the way I lived today. Sure, I made mistakes in thoughts or words or actions, but theres an overall sense of “im supposed to be here” through it all. I could see it becoming a way to avoid things that could help others and getting online or messing around watching tv for hours (in fact ive met MANY missionaries who watch SO much tv its crazy! Way to take our minds off things.) But pray I use time wisely while here?
I’ve invented hotchocolate/candycane tea and its my fav. I am currently hosting a “study party” for 4 friends from ANU. They’re here with me in my flat drinking chocolate tea and eating fruit loops and “studying”. We’re about to go play cards.
Hey, my teaching’s not so bad. I told the students sorry if its too slow, but I cant do anything about it…if im too FAST, raise your hand and let me know and I will do something about it. Believe it or not (probably not), I’m not going too fast! I bet someone prayed specifically that I’d take it slow. 😀 thanks, you!
Coming soon: mutatu post (the dangers of my commute daily..not for the faint of heart.)
The bathroom visitor post (the black slug that makes me want to throw up).
The everyone I’ve met here has or has had recently an amoeba (and im afraid) post.
The please skype me post.
The please write me (MOM!) post.
The I miss papa post.
Update: there were four black slugs in the flat since yesterday. Every one I remove freaks me out more than the last.
Now: I know it sounds silly but I am actually seriously alarmed when I see one bigger than my thumb lying on the floor. They curl up and try to get away if I try to scoot them into a bag…anyway im beyond worried cause I don’t know how they’re getting in and my apt is so clean!
Im going to talk to someone about it today. Anyway, prayer request.