Monthly Archives: February 2010

t ride from h e double hockey sticks.


did you have another amazing day?






that is my name





was the worst ride of my life

but the day was amazing yes



what happened?




first i got soaked


“jumped in a pool soaked”

really bad

then i went to get on the T at central square

and an old man started talking to me

kept talking to me

we get on

after the braintree line leaves

i needed ashmont

so im cold cold cold

sopping wet

could probably wring out my skirt

right so then he gets on

its just us and like 1-2 other people






so he sits across from me

has 1 tooth and like

a rubber band

i always tlak to these people

well let them talk rather

anyways he goes can sit next to you

comes and sits NEXT TO ME directly

its just us basically

train starts






im cold cold cold

and like sopping wet

and he starts talking about prophecy

being fulfilled

ive never

in my life seen (ever) someone talk like this

it was ok at first

but the T was busted

so uh

every stop we’d open the doors 10 minutes

and wait 10 minutes (doors open

the other couple that got on somewhere in there

is laughing HYSTERICALLY at him

and talking about us (loudly)

and i winked at them and then they like DIED LAUGHING
so now hes still going

ad im nodding

and theyre laughing

and the doors are staying opej

i wanted to cry

almost 1.5 hours

not lying.

and then more walking in the torrential rain

im not exagerrating.



it sounds frightening



at one point hes like

“youre cold! its the lord telling me to take you into my arms”.

no lie.




at least he gets points for creativity



so did you ward him off and finally get there?






so i hope the day got better from there?



oh oh that was just now

the day was amazing.



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Christians ripping on each other: why i despise it

One of the key things Jesus said to the disciples about reaching the world was NOT in the “Great Commission”.  It was in John 13:35:

35 By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

I’ve been thinking about this opportunity for people who do not feel “Called to evangelism” or “Called to hospitality” with the outside (outside of our Christian bubble) world.  It’s basically saying to love each OTHER as an example of our love for Christ.  This led me to think about my relationships with Christians. (relationships with non-christians can be highlighted in a different post—if you’re not “a follower of Christ” it’s not  as if i just stick you into a particular category of “unbeliever”.  I value your friendship as much as the people below (or more depending on the group, i guess!)  But for the sake of this posting– I think most of my church-people friendships fit into a few categories:

1.) The acquaintances i really like: There are a lot of Christians I appreciate and like to hang out with, but we do not have time to actually get to know each other outside of weekly church (large group) events.  I hang out with these people over chips and cookies and we talk about the office (show on NBC) and similar small talkish things.  When talking to these people i appreciate nametags since sometimes people know my name and i forgot theirs.  How do we look to the world if we are out at a bar/restaurant/bowling alley?  We look just like anyone else.

2.) The good friend group: These friends and I have known each other for a while, and while not super-deep friends, we’ve had conversations here and there that show me we are not shallow either.  We like to hang out often as we can, are still getting to know each other, and are usually in groups of 4-6 people at a time, guys and girls for movies, game nights and sometimes prayer.  How do we look to others?  Well, a lot of our events involve staying in at someone’s apartment, but when we ARE out at a public event or something, we look similar to the world and since we know each other a little better, we rip on each other a lot.  You know, we tease..more than we realize (could use a videocamera for a 3 hour hang out session to see how much is teasing/ripping on each other and how much is encouragement of each other, right?)..

3.) The good friends: These friends of mine and I talk primarily about Jesus.  We can’t avoid it.  He comes up in conversation constantly.  To the world we look like old friends having tea and catching up or talking about something we are passionate about.

There’s way more categories but I’m only showing 3 to point something out.  In all of these situations, our love for one another is not necessarily letting people know that we are Christ’s disciples.  In particular, ripping on each gets way old.  I don’t see where (especially at the level to which we often go) it fits in to the plans of Christ for our growth.  Sometimes (like 1 out of 10) someone will crack a joke at someone’s expensive that’s so funny and on the mark, i about die laughing.  Most of the time, it’s slightly witty or a little funny, but not really, and some people either don’t get it (inside joke guys!) and feel left out, or feel excluded in some other way.

I’m learning this: my tongue has a lot of power to help or hurt–and even when I think i’m building others up “You look so fantastic today!”, i should be careful not to speak in idleness (maybe that girl is insecure and thinks she looks good only cause she wore 2 lbs of makeup and has extra on today) or carelessness.

The main point is: Not every time we hang out in a group of Christians is there “fellowship”.  Sure we are “the fellowship” but when we flip on a movie or decide to have LOST night and watch 5 episodes, it’s not fellowship (feel free to define that in the comments section).

What an opportunity we have to display to the world that we are Christ’s disciples, just by loving each other!  Instead, we try to look like the world.  Some of us “bite and devour each other” (Gal. 5:15), some of us (Eph. 5:4 and 4:29) just laugh in coarse joking around, and other times we just talk about nothing.

Every year, Muslim pilgrims go to Mecca for the Haj and often, accidents occur: .  People (by the hundreds) die in the heat by being trampled on by their brothers and sisters.  We can offer something else through this key part of the Great Commission, but we often fail to show the world that we are not the same as everybody else—and I havent even mentioned our relationships with OTHERS! just the Christians!

Websites that poke fun at Christians or Jesus (and are made by Christians) might have a place if they could only be seen by Christians.  But sites like, Vintage 21’s Jesus videos and a few others are (though sometimes hilarious) usually not worth the laughs they give us or the time they take to create or read—theyre just a public example of how Christians can be funny and rip on each other–and i hate them a lot.

Can we just encourage each other more or talk about Jesus and what He is doing?  Can we fast and pray together and provide for the needs of all the poor or hurting among us?  Then the world will know we’re Christ’s disciples.  It leaves very little room for “That’s what she said” in our meetings.

p.s. i recognize i am part of the problem :).

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Busted up heart

Two quotes about development can get this post rolling, one I’ve typed and deleted 6 times already.
My heart is too broken to even figure out how to tell you all about it.  If you cry easy in movies, quit reading now.
“I have learned that I, we, are a dollar-a-day people (which is terrible, they say, because a cow in Japan is worth $9 a day). This means that a Japanese cow would be a middle class Kenyan… a $9-a-day cow from Japan could very well head a humanitarian NGO in Kenya. Massages are very cheap in Nairobi, so the cow would be comfortable.”
— Binyavanga Wainaina
“Development is about transforming the lives of people, not just transforming economies.”
— Joseph E. Stiglitz (Making Globalization Work)
If you’re a close friend or sponsor of FFF, please know we can communicate more on this when I get more information.
Remember when I first talked about my day traveling to Kware/Embakasi?  How i said it’s even poorer than Mwiki (which is POOR) and that kids couldnt even sit up straight?  Then my heart was torn and I knew I had to do something.  So we transformed a church into a school (the only school around the whole entire village, which exists in a garbage dump filled with pigs and gross trash).
We raised money to build little walls and benches for little rears to sit on.  We built blackboards.  It opened.  Then it got flooded.  Some horrible mean person sent water straight into it via a dam he created.
So then we raised thousands more and bought land (for those of you who donated, most of your money went to mattresses, food and things like chicken projects in Mwiki–a lot raised was my own…and sent it along.  We sent more to be used for iron, labor, cement and other things we needed to finish the two-story school.  Finally, in the end, it was finished and as soon as we wrapped up labor on the kiddos latrine, it was ready for opening day.  There had never been a school before in Kware.  And this one was two stories with enough room for widows and single moms to practice their projects and handcrafts.
Then on Tuesday, a gang stole all of our walls, roof and other pieces of iron.  The finished school is now a lot of wooden sticks sticking out of the ground.  The final product is worse than the first.  Started with hope and ends with dashed hopes.  Started with land we could consider buying and ended up with people in jail (my guess is that the thieves were teenagers but thats just a guess really).
Right.  This week i also got news that a friend killed himself last week (i wont explain more, its graphic) in his dorm room, and that breaks my heart even more because suicide is a whole nother thing (especially for Christians)–all this is causing me to seek and surrender to God more than ever, because if I don’t, I worry that my heart/mind will try to get mad or something–always at an incorrect target.  God loves the kids more than I do and Danny more than i did.  So i need to place all this passion in His hands–not expecting answers but trusting and praising Him in all situations.
In closing, I’m sorry if you feel like what you’ve been a part of is a failure.  These kids are still fed every month through sponsors, and the project in Mwiki is going remarkably well, with the women working hard on projects, and saving money in a fund, registering as a community based organization and working hard to get small business loans to start their own initiatives.  It’s a far cry from where we started.  The kids are all healthy in Mwiki and are growing up strong and happy–and in Kware, they’re at least able to have food, but the idea for a school has not worked.
It’s hard not to get on the next flight over there but I’m still workin here–please pray for wisdom and guidance for the school board, myself and henry as we determine next steps and seek God together.

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A brief update on things today.

i cannot express my thankfulness to God for the past few weeks–every Sunday is more extreme than the last in terms of “MY MIND WAS BLOWN AND I HOPE I GOT GREAT NOTES”.

Every week has more crazy stories than the last (this week was a homeless friend and 4 new people ive never really met coming to dinner and playing board games) and more wonderful memories (this week my parents even came and we went out for dinner–cant remember the last time i did that, at least  2 months ago, and i adoorrre my parents).  More importantly, God is MOVING IN BOSTON–who’d’ve thought here of all places He would be doing the miraculous and filling people like my friends and I with his spirit?!

season of discipline and excitement started today.

Anyways–im also thankful for the course i’m taking on Sunday nights called Perspectives in World Missions.  If anyone wants to have a conversation sometime on the Kingdom of God, i’m in!  in terms of non-Christ-centered news—ive got megabus tickets to NYC for sale (Boston folks) since i have no desire to bounce to another random city when all this is happening here, but i AM committed to leading worship with friends at Lake Winnepasauke in 2 weeks.

poll: Do you read my blog? comment if its “yes”. :).




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