1 Samuel 3:1

And the child Samuel ministered to the LORD before Eli. And the word of the LORD was precious in those days; there was no open vision..

Today in Church i was thinking about a few things because the message did just what it should–it went down really deep. Thanks for preaching what He asked you to, David!

1.) I recently (this week) realized that I’ve been more impatient lately than I was when i was 6 years old. And for what? Things like travel, love, adventure. Ridiculous. At least if I am going to be impatient for something, it should be the glory of the Lord to rise in Boston! Rather than simply being ashamed of my impatience, I’m recognizing this as a season God’s given me to learn true joy and satisfaction in just Him.

But with impatience has come a severe inconsistency. It is similar to my vision currently. Having just experienced LASIK for the first time, there are moments i can barely see and it’s blurry everywhere, and other moments where things are mostly clear. It changes a lot. Soon as i think i’m improving, it worsens. Blink a few times and it changes.

My prayers/relationship with Him has been all over the place recently. In one moment, everything is crystal clear: He is all that matters, my point for living, and all i have to do is please HIM. Not others, not myself, not even my bosses or parents or friends. Just HIM. If he wants me to get married, serve in Africa, be a writer, a prophetess, it will come from Him at the right time. IF not, just knowing Him is enough!

The next moment, everything changes. I hear word of a young woman headed to Saudi Arabia, I hear someone else received a word of prophecy, I don’t feel good, it’s rainy…and all of a sudden, I’m back to distracted and self-focused (still spiritual, but self-focused) floundering. It’s like in James–the ‘wave being thrown and tossed by the wind’.

Then someone gives me a good word from the Bible and everything is crystal clear again. Lord, give me steadfast love like you have!!!

To battle this, I need to stick to some specific things. Fasting, prayer, scheduled bible reading (otherwise i’ll probably skip) — it really is my food. I guess it’s a good sign that I can’t go a few days without His Word–but as it’s starting to taste more and more like food I want to have in my heart, I need to take advantage of these hungry times and eat as much as possible.

These sorts of times will never be in vain. That’s why i love prayer and the Word so much–because it is NEVER never in vain. I never have to worry about wasting time again! If I open the BIble it will do something worthwhile in eternity, every time. If i’m stuck by the side of the road one day waiting for a tow, or my T is broken, and i lift prayers to HIM for the nations, i’m not wasting time. I am in a position to never waste time ever again while waiting. In the same way, if I have a lonely night (or 5 day long period of not being able to see or venture out during the day) — every second can be filled with times that are not in vain, spent with Him (whether it feels like we’re together now or he feels distant).

2.) Do I minister to the Lord? Samuel did! He ministered TO GOD. God is a person who can relate to us and who seeks to be served by us. I must spend moments (hours if can!) ministering to HIM. Then when storms come and i’m being battered, I know that my relationship with Him is strong and ready to handle all–because it’s a 2-way ministry relationship where we minister to each other and prepare to do His will on earth til he takes me home—-David said in this time, we need to: 1.) Minister to God in WHATEVER the circumstance, 2.) Learn to hear his voice and practice our gifts. Even if nothing changes for 30 years, those are things i need to work on doing.

Are there seasons for everything under heaven? Yes. But in every season I should Minister to GOD, practice my gifts, and learn to hear His voice! Then come what may, I’ll be close enough to Him to know what he wants me to do. It’s so exciting. Especially cause our whole church heard the same message.

Church! Let’s really press in during this time where we ARE hungry and not let it become just a moment with Him. We simply have to minister to Him alone, bear one another’s burdens together, and wait on Him. The glory is returning! The cows are coming (LOL 1 Samuel 6, i’d love to be those farmers) — get ready for it! When my eyes are removed from the eternal point that is GREATER than anything the world gives, please, siblings at Fenway, encourage me to plaster them back on HIm, the author and finisher of our faith! It’s never a waste of time to minister to the Lord! Hallelujah! :D.

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